This is the funniest thing I’ve read in a long time. I wonder if I could adapt it. Probably not; it’s just too good on its own. Thanks to Robyn for the link.
You've stumbled across my official website and landed on the front page of my weblog.
My name is Rosina Lippi. I'm a former academic and tenured university professor, writing full time since 2000. Under the pen name Sara Donati I am the author of the Wilderness series, six historical novels that follow the fortunes of a group of families living in upstate New York from about 1792-1825. A new series based on later generations of the same families was launched September 1, 2015 with The Gilded Hour. The next volume in the new series, Where the Light Enters, was released in 2019.
If you are in difficulties with a book, try the element of surprise: attack it at an hour when it isn’t expecting it.
— H.G. Wells (attributed), Sir Osbert Sitwell
See the whole Wise Guys collection here.